"Dinner in a Bottle"

A reader recently sent in this link to an article about MeatWater in which the reporter seems to think that MeatWater is in fact an actual, available product. It's not real, folks.

It is an incredibly creative campaign that forces people to think twice about the culture of "food" around us. Their message is so carefully laced into our modern expectations for new food products that a lot of people seem to believe that Hungarian Gulash water will soon be available at the grocer.

I urge you to read more about the campaign here and then spend some time on the MeatWater website. And I hope that this clever hoax doesn't create an actual... gulp... demand for such a product. Yikes.

The Booze You Love in a Can??

Panama-based company Scottish Spirits believes that folks who like to drink whiskey outdoors would prefer to do so out of a can. For now, "straight whiskey in a can" is only available in Caribbean and South American markets where it is being marketed as "the perfect size to be shared between three people who can mix it with other things like cola."

I think it encourages over-consumption and is probably about as palatable as a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in a can.

Read all about the alcoholic-coma-can here.

Soda Cup + Chicken Caddy = Ultimate Convenience??

If you thought inventions like the Candwich and crispycones were the ultimate convenience foods, think again. This "all-in-one" creation has been around since 2008 but we here at JustSaying only got wind of it today so... Eww. Read more here.

Using More Than Our Share

Annie Leonard's The Story of Stuff Project is getting lots of attention lately and we here at JustSaying LOVE IT. Sure, they're a little reminiscent of a UPS commercial and Annie works hard to speak in a language and tone understandable by all ages (AKA kids) but considering this blogger learned that plastic comes from oil via a children's book, we're tipping our hats to Annie and recommending her videos to our readers young and old. Even if you have read every book on our recommended list and every post to date, you will learn something from these videos and be moved to consume less (or feel like a total sucker). Check it out:

The Candwich??

Mark One Foods has literally canned convenience. I think Eater said it best:

"Like a cross between a Little Debbie and a cold Hot Pocket, but also in a can, the Candwich is the next batsh*t crazy convenience food hitting shelves. Although it's targeting the pre-school, camping, and construction worker demographic, it seems more like a novelty or a military ration than something anyone would actually eat on a regular basis."

Jimmy Dean

A reader wrote in asking is we'd be doing a tribute to "sausage magnate"Jimmy Dean in honor of his recent passing. Due to time restrictions this morning, the best we can do is direct you to Buzzfeed's breakdown of the best comments on various JD products found on jimmydean.com. Find it here.

Meat Vending Machine

That's right, folks. Vending machines aren't just for DVDs, bathing suits, sodas, and pizza anymore. Butcher shop Izarzugaza in Northern Spain decided it was time for 24 hour service. Read all about it here.

Are you kidding me, Kleenex?

"People in the U.S. dry their hands on cloth bathroom towels approximately 200 billion times a year. The CDC guidelines for hand washing recommends hand drying with a single-use towel. Families have not had a practical alternative to traditional cloth hand towels in their home bathrooms… until now. Kleenex® Hand Towels are an innovative solution that delivers one clean, fresh, dry towel every time you wash your hands."

"Your hands are only as clean as the towel you dry them with."

Way to prey on the germaphobes. And people who have never heard of paper towels.

Heintz unveils (apparently long awaited) ketchup packet redesign

AP Reports: The new design has a base that's more like a cup for dipping and also a tear-off end for squeezing, plus it holds three times as much ketchup than a traditional packet. "The packet has long been the bane of our consumers," said Dave Ciesinski, vice president of Heinz Ketchup. "The biggest complaint is there is no way to dip and eat it on-the-go."

I don't even know what to say about this. Disposable ketchup packets, like single serving yogurt containers, apparently haven't been convenient enough for the on-the-go crowd and Hientz has "finally" revamped the way they package ketchup.

I suppose Matt Kurtz, the founder of  "Prop 57" - a facebook group started by  to "draw awareness" to the packets' shortcomings - hasn't driven and Gogurted yet??

(thnx Bec)

Frighteningly on point

"The food you love in a cone"

Readers, meet crispycones, brought to you by chef and food designer Nir Adar, who doesn't think anyone should have to sit down to eat beef stew. Nope. His quest: To make it possible to eat all the foods you love on the go.

"They're incredibly versatile, delicious with fillings from eggs to salads, pizza to deli, stir fry to carnitas, BBQ, stews and even dessert. Any food that's ever been eaten between two slices of bread, in a wrap or on top of pizza can now be enjoyed drip free, anywhere, anytime and on the go with Crispycones."


And I thought go-gurt was the king of convenience...

Yes, this really exists.

This is just plain silly. And lacks the capacity for dinosaur shaped pancakes. Yet the makers of ChefStack Perfect Panless Pancakes think it's a revolution in the making. From their website:

"[It's] the worlds first automatic pancake machine. The patented process cooks hot, fresh pancakes in a matter of seconds. From an all-natural batter, 97% fat free pancakes emerge at a rate of up to 200 per hour!"

Unusual, but not entirely surprising, contaminated "food" recall

Yesterday, after US health officials linked Toll House refrigerated cookie dough to E. coli infections in as many as 66 people in 28 states, Nestle USA recalled the convenience item I am struggling to call "food." From the NY Times article:

Officials have been hunting since March for the cause of cases from across the country that shared the same genetic fingerprint. Because most victims were young and female, the investigation was unusual from the start. Twenty-five people have been hospitalized, including seven who suffered a severe complication called hemolytic uremic syndrome. No one has died.

Among the early food suspects were strawberries and fruit smoothies, but neither quite fit. On Wednesday, health investigators in Washington State proposed a link with Nestlé’s raw cookie dough, prompting officials in the rest of the country to re-interview victims. All six in Minnesota confirmed eating raw dough, said Carlota Medus, an epidemiologist in the state health department.

As tempted as I am to rant about the sorry state of food safety, I think I have to bring up consumer responsibility instead. I mean, isn't there a universal rule about not eating raw cookie dough (unless, of course, it happens to be mixed with ice cream in a Ben 'N Jerry's container)? And if you do dare to taste a spoonful of raw cookie dough or brownie batter, aren't you admittedly taking a gamble?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that Nestle should be entirely off the hook... I'm just saying that while food safety officials investigate the source of contamination, be it an ingredient or something within the processing facility, maybe people could use a little common sense.

drum roll please...

The NY Times reports that the non-profit cancer prevention organization, The Cancer Project, has debuted their list of the five unhealthiest items sold in our nation's fast food chains. Read Roni Caryn Rabin's full article here and read highlights below:

* Jack in the Box’s junior bacon cheeseburger topped the list as the worst offender. The burger costs just one dollar but is packed with 23 grams of fat, including 8 grams of saturated fat, 55 milligrams of cholesterol and 860 milligrams of sodium and just one gram of fiber.

* In second-worst place, the 89-cent Taco Bell cheesy double beef burrito, with 460 calories, 20 grams of fat and a whopping 1,620 milligrams of sodium.

* In third-worst place was the one-dollar Burger King breakfast sausage biscuit, with 27 grams of fat, including 15 grams of saturated fat and over 1,000 milligrams of sodium.

* Fourth worst went to the one-dollar McDonald’s McDouble, which contains 19 grams of fat and 65 milligrams of cholesterol.

* Last, and least-worst, was the Wendy’s junior bacon cheeseburger, for $1.53, with 310 calories and 16 grams of fat.

"corn syrup adds a dash of sweetness"

If you like hot dogs, I do not recommend pressing play below. Ick. I mean, it isn't anything groundbreaking or shocking... just sort of gross.

I don't even know where to start...

How did I not know about Ableman??

A friend of mine mentioned Michael Ableman in an email so I promptly googled him and came across something he wrote regarding E. Coli tainted spinach back in 2006. We seem to see through the same eyes. From Know Your Farmer, Know Your Food:

Not long ago lettuce came only in heads and spinach in bunches. For a salad, someone else might do the growing, but you still did the trimming and washing. You had some control -- and responsibility -- over the process. Now salad comes prewashed and bagged. You just pour it on a plate, dress it, put it in your mouth and chew.

This convenience adds risk. You give one more job over to someone somewhere else, trusting that they are concerned as much about product quality and your health as about the bottom line on the quarterly report.

But the business of food is now big business, and it might be making us sick. Witness the spinach tainted with E. coli bacteria that is blamed for more than 180 people infected in 26 states and Ontario, Canada, including one death.

The first mixed salad greens and loose spinach were from small, local growers who hand-cut the young greens and rushed them to market, organ-transplant style. Now we have a multimillion-dollar salad industry that consolidates raw ingredients from many big producers and has little control over growing methods. Washing salad ingredients on this scale requires facilities more like municipal swimming pools or public bathhouses than where our food should come from. And if you remember sixth-grade biology, you know that stuffing fresh, green leaves into sealed plastic bags is a great way to breed bacteria.

The spinach scare has prompted cries for better regulation and inspection. But the drama over one microorganism distracts us from something much bigger: a vast industrial food system built on cheap, empty calories -- from government-subsidized corn, for example -- that feed epidemic levels of obesity and diabetes. Sometimes it seems a system more interested in finding ways to pump more high-fructose corn syrup into kids' breakfast cereals than in providing fresh, whole foods to nourish their growing bodies. Click here to continue reading.

So some new suggested reading (for myself and others):

Fields of Plenty: A Farmer's Journey in Search of Real Food and the People Who Grow It by Michael Ableman

On Good Land: The Autobiography of an Urban Farm by Michael Ableman

From the Good Earth: A Celebration of Growing Food Around the World by Michael Ableman

A few Michael Ableman articles that appeared in the LA Times

It was only a matter of time

Another cancer fighting cocktail. Computer World reports that researchers at Rice University are genetically engineering a beer that, with the addition of resveratrol, will have "higher and more consistent concentrations of the cancer-fighting chemical" than red wine. Read all about it here.

So resveratrol is naturally a part of grapes, red wine and pomegranates yet they are putting the chemical into beer? When does it become a chemical? Mmm... yummy hoppy chemical? A researcher quoted in the article said, "In general, the addition of the resveratrol shouldn't affect the taste of the beer, since the chemical is odorless and tasteless." Hmm...

Anywho, back in June, scientists at the University of Wisconsin called resveratrol "a key reason for the so-called French Paradox- the observation that French people have lower rates of heart disease despite a cuisine known for its cream sauces and decadent cheeses, all loaded with heart-clogging saturated fats." Something tells me that American eating and drinking habits may vary from the French a tad bit more than that one little compound. And... well... suggesting that popping open a cold one will deliver more resveratrol, more consistently than it's natural source just doesn't seem like great advice.

(thnx Troy)

Does this mean I am officially an adult?

After sending this someecard to a childhood partner-in-crime, I got to thinking, ignorance really is bliss. I mean, it is totally damaging and detrimental to our poor planet, but in a small way I envy those who can go through a drive-thru without a hint of feedlot remorse, or get everything they feel they need from Wal-Mart at a super-low cost, with an unnatural shelf life, and without that guilty "ugh I am supporting this corporation" pang I feel after taking advantage of their inexpensive bulk packs of toilet paper. At least I am no longer sneaking out and hurling it over trees.

For more awesome ecards like this one visit http://www.someecards.com/

Yuck.

Apparently someone, namely J&D, thought it was too tedious to put bacon as well as mayonnaise (both clearly mandatory) on their sandwiches so viola: Baconnaise! Ugh.

"Baconnaise: The ultimate bacon-flavored spread. Use it on sandwiches, salads, dips, sauces, chicken, fish and fries. Vegetarian safe!"

The comments on the site are the best:

"How did I eat burgers without this!?!" -Jessica M.

"Why would you have fries if you could have bacon fries?" - Chuck H.

"I' would eat that with a spoon." -Steven K.

"I don't dine on swine, but wow, that's really good." -Marcia R.

Like Marcia, I don't dine on swine so I guess I should be thanking my lucky stars that Baconnaise is "vegetarian safe." And did I mention there is a "lite" version? I think I am going to lose my breakfast... For kicks, check out all the bacon merchandise here.